oh god the rape fog is back!
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
