You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
