im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
