If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Randomize
