You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize