no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
