Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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