How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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