So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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