I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
