You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
i out mim tonsoeep
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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