I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
high people should be assigned attendants
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
