i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
You dont lie about slip and slides
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
