I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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