I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
