What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
