his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
