does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
