careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
