bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
