like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
