IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize