If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
