i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
