so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
