the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
