I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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