I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
