I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
