What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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