I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I'm passing your future prison.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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