sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
vagina is talking i cant
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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