I'm so fucking centered right now
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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