So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize