Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You can't special order awesome
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
