grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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