I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
