His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
