i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
