of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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