i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
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