I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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