you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
