in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
