HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
