I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
