He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
