Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
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