Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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