She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize
