uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
