she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
